“You Crack Me Up” (& Other White Lies)
I’ve already addressed Realtor euphemisms in a post titled, “Homes with Great Personalities” — & Other White Lies (ranked fourth in the world by Google, incidentally — type in “real estate euphemisms” and see for yourself).
In the spirit of inclusiveness, I thought I’d do a follow-up devoted to real estate office manager euphemisms (or at least one in particular):
What the office manager says: ‘you crack me up.’
What they mean: ‘you exasperate me.’
What the office manager says: ‘I think we’ve covered that’ (uttered at a contentious weekly office meeting)
What the office manager means: ‘Everyone, shut the &%!@# up already!’
What the office manager says: ‘I might have put that a little differently.”
What the office manager means: ‘You said what?? To them? Are you crazy?!!’
What the office manager says: ‘You didn’t need me to tell you that.’
What the office manager means: ‘You needed me to tell you that?!?”
What the office manager says: ‘What can I help you with, [your first name here, uttered (a little too) slowly]?’
What the office manager means: ‘You’re calling my home line — after hours — again??”
Note all the !!’s and ??’s omitted from the first (euphemistic) version of each pair.
Thanks, Josh . . . . (you can’t say I never listen to you anymore).
